Birthday

Yo dude it was the girl's birthday today. I sent her a text saying happy birthday. I hate it yo, the girl always writes to me saying "Miss ya". It's casual, no shit. I'm not going to read into it deeper than what it is. Why though?

I was in the middle of working out. When she wrote back, I lost the drive to work out. It sucks. She still makes me fucking weak.

I remember when we stopped talking dude, I watched ETERNAL SUNSHINE OF THE SPOTLESS MIND. The first time I saw this movie in 2004, I fucking loved it. Well, if you're not from Long Island, I'll explain. Long Island is like a long skinny oval, kind of. I live in the middle of it. In the movie, Jim Carrey lived a little bit further to the left. All the way on the farrr right is Montauk. If you ever drive out there, it's like a skinny piece of land connects to a large island shape at the end, which is Montauk. It's kind of it's own city at the end of Long Island, 20 miles from the next closest city, and about 70 miles from where I live. When you look at the train schedule, Montauk is at the very end of the south train. I had always wanted to take a train there for no reason, and when Jim Carrey did it, I thought it was cool.

Dude, as soon as me and this chick ended, I FUCKING knew I wish I could erase her from my mind.

It sucks man. I just wish it was gone. I wish I stopped giving a shit. I'm trying to take control, and end it. Just never think of her again. It's just not that easy. Dude she was everything I could have wanted in a fucking woman, how the fuck do I find that again? How do I just forget it?

Fuck me bro.